Internet Dating Part 1

As Carla gets herself ready for her date she starts to panic! She starts to wonder “Omgoodness I can’t believe I’m doing this!! I never thought I’d do this! What if he’s disappointed when he sees me? What if he looks like a troll? Maybe I shouldn’t go…..” Carla convinces herself to take the plunge and go through with the date. This may be her opportunity to make a connection with someone great. Why pass it up just because of how she met the guy? She hops in her car and starts heading towards the coffee shop. She pulls into the parking lot, takes one last look at her face and hair and says, “Ok girl, it’s now or never….” As she walks into the coffee shop she spots Marcel at the table by the window and tells herself “Let’s seeing if internet dating is for me..”

Internet dating has become the next best thing when trying to broaden your chances on meeting someone new. Seems like technology plays a part in every aspect of our lives these days. I remember going over to my cousins house as they invited tons of friends over just to hangout. It was the perfect way of meeting “a friend of a friend” in the most comfortable situation. Why comfortable? Their family of 3 girls and 2 boys ALWAYS had people hanging out or coming over for special events. Sometimes at these get togethers, people would often see each other more than once and you can certainly get the 411 about someone in a matter of a couple of minutes. The beauty of these house parties is that there was no pressure or rush to get all the facts you needed in a short amount of time.

NOW things are different. People go out more. They may go to a bar/clubbing hoping they’ll find the one there, you may find someone at work, or other venues that we often frequent like the grocery store. However, we have this wonderful thing at home called a computer that makes everything easy! Shoot I’d order me a man in a second if it were that easy! But the closest thing we could get to ordering a mate is internet dating. You search through profiles hoping to find a connection. Most of us are too busy to be social and go out, so we miss out on opportunities to meet someone special ( I’m so guilty of being a home body lol) The internet brings your options right to your computer screen. How convenient! It’s perfect right?

What were your first impressions of internet dating?
Have you tried it?
Would you try it and Why?

This topic will have more than one part to it so stay tuned! Thanks for reading!

That Moment

Do you know that moment…................?
That single moment after you’ve applied that last bit of makeup and you put the pencil or brush down….you lean back just a bit to get the full affect of the finished product. There’s this small burst of emotions which include excitement, satisfaction, and confidence all at once. I’ve always felt that makeup shouldn’t make you feel like you're hiding behind a mask, but to reveal something that seemed invisible become crystal clear.

I recently had the opportunity to try a new cosmetic line hoping that I’d get that moment I just described. Thevi Cosmetics is a unique line that targets the New Ethnic Market—every light to-dark skinned woman of Asian, South Asian, Hispanic, Middle Eastern and Mediterranean descent. It’s described as a sleek, modern line of innovative cosmetics which includes rich, vibrant shades that are joyful to wear. Their line is described as “Inner Beauty Made Visible.”

I wanted to find out if all they had described on their website was true. I happen to have dark chocolate brown skin and at times it is difficult to find shades that suite me. When I received my samples from the Thevi line, I was very thrilled!! I found the sleek chrome cases very enticing. I couldn’t wait to try everything out. I gave them a short list of items that caught my attention on their website and they were gracious enough to fulfill my request. I received Matte Shadow in Bordeaux (left), Moss (right) and Triple Split Shadow Bistro (middle)

I also received Longlasting Eyeliner in Onyx (black) and High Impact Lipstick in Drama (left) and Brownie (right)

The first thing I tried was the eyeshadow and eyeliner because my eyes are my bestfriends in the land of makeup! When I opened the lid for the Matte Shadows in both colors, I immediately became disappointed because I instantly knew it was not going to work out….(oh boy) My heart sank as I attempted to apply both eyeshadows on my eyelids only to find that my dark chocolate eyelid remained the same color. *sigh* I didn’t give up hope and moved onto the Triple Shadow which did appear! Hooray!!! The lightest shade gave my eye a hint of sparkle that would be delightful to wear during the day! So after trying all the shades Idecided that it was keeper along with the eyeliner.--->

Now onto the lipstick!!! Ok that was me being excited before I put it on and this is the part I didn’t want to come to…LOL I’m sad to report that it did not go over very well. I found both colors to be way too light (almost a glow in the dark effect)for my skin tone that I couldn’t stand to look at myself with it on in the mirror. Eeeekkkk! lol That certainly is not the feeling I want right? However, I must admit that the lipstick glided on my lips effortlessly, felt amazingly light and they were moisturized! It also has a nice gloss to it that doesn’t make you run to get some clear lipgloss! Although I did not like the lipstick for my skin tone, both shades did come in very vibrant and rich colors as described on their website. Below are my lips with Browie on with just one application. I couldn't bring myself to show you what it looked like with two on.


I couldn’t bring myself to write this review without "showcasing" some of the colors that I do enjoy wearing so that Thevi Cosmetics has an idea of the look I try to achieve. My eyes need hints of sparkle at all times as to draw attention to them! lol I tend to lean towards VERY dark rich colors that compliment my lips (mostly in the brown lip gloss family) I think lipgloss is the next best thing right now, so if Thevi had a line of gloss with just a hint of color I'd pick from those rather then the lipstick. Below you will find pictures of what I like to wear on my eyes that I feel compliment my skin tone and make my eyes POP! In addition, you will also see the only red lipstick I own and feel comfortable wearing.

So there you have it. Thevi didn’t work for me and I tried it knowing that the women they are targeting may in fact have skin just as dark as mine. However, I may have my Hispanic friend who is very fair skin give it a try!

So tell me how do you feel after you finish putting on makeup?? What is that moment like??

Thanks for reading my review!

How to Navigate Through Changes

Life is hard….Ok wait lemme say that again if you missed it the first time because that statement is so true Life Is Hard! I remember being a little kid and asking my mom to buy me a candy bar and she told me that she didn’t have the money (she did though LOL) and I made a promise… I said “When I grow up, I’m going to buy a snikers bar everyday lol I thought “Hey when I get older I’ll have dollar bills that would flow out of my pockets so I could buy whatever I wanted.” Well I was in for a surprise when I finally grew up and I learned about bills, budgeting, and spending. That’s just the tip of the iceberg because on top of that you have to start building your career, dating, forging relationships with people, or distancing yourselves from people you don’t like anymore. You start to notice things about yourself and you make Changes! Life is about Change! The person you were in the past, is not who you are today? You’ve grown, and have been through many challenges. Maybe you’re happy with your current life or just down right mad and bitter. Whatever the case may be, we all go through different types of changes that we have to deal with.

So picture this….You’re married, in a serious relationship or you’ve created a great bond with a friend. For the past few months, weeks, or maybe days you notice something different about the person. Sometimes it’s subtle changes like your phone call hasn’t been returned, you noticed that your conversations just don’t flow quite as easily, maybe the person stop doing something that they use to love, or they’re working way to hard and not leaving room for hanging out. We expect change when something huge happens like having a baby/relocating but what about the little changes that may cause your relationship to go in another direction….it hasn’t gotten bad YET but your Intuition is telling you something is not right…..and your thoughts start to flow like this à “She seems preoccupied at dinner I wonder if something happened earlier today..” “Wow, he passed on an opportunity to hang out tonight with his friends….” “I know he cares about me, but that kiss he just gave me was off…” “My best friend told her co-worker that her mom was sick and I didn’t find out until a week later”

What do you do when life changes start to penetrate you’re relationships?

Do you ask questions and investigate immediately? Or do you wait to gather more information? Maybe you just don’t know how to address the situation or the person who’s changing doesn’t realize it’s affecting the relationship.

What’s your 1^st course of action in order to navigate through changes?

Finding Love In Washington, DC

1-Do you feel that it is hard to find a woman you are interested in?
I do believe it is difficult to find a woman that I am interested in, for one, I am very well traveled, so with that being said I have lived in about 6 different countries and I have dated women in most of them except for two but with that being well traveled has given me a combination of different cultural characteristics that I like on women. I am also of Caribbean upbringing so even though I am american that is a factor in what I look for in a woman.

2-What are some of the challenges you face trying to find a connection with someone?
For one in the DC metropolitan area I meet women of color who are very sheltered to there own cultures and environments, so are not willing to try other things this includes race. I am black as I mentioned but I am open to dating other races. Second I am older now 36 years of age, and I have no children. Most women in my age bracket if they are single have had some past marriages, relationships or whatever that have left them with kids, and a man dating a woman with a child, or children is a completely different scenario. There is truly a different attitude about women with kids in my time now then in my parent’s time. So finding a woman in my age range with no kids is also a challenge. Also education, I do not have a degree, but I am very intelligent speaking 4 languages, and knowing a variety of different things and topics. I am well spoken and I have many other traits that illustrate education, now I am going to school currently, but sometimes women view that as a flaw, especially women of my genre that I am looking to date or used to dating. On the flip side of that sometimes I do understand of wanting to know where woman would hold that against you on that educational tip.

3-Do you feel that you have an advantage because there are so many women to pick from?
I don’t feel I am at an advantage, always, but for the most part recently I have been seeing that I am lucky to a certain extent, because I do have that in my favor, but there is a down side to this. Sometimes I wonder if I meet a woman and date and see some things I don’t like, if I am judging them too harsh because I know that I have a better chance of meeting someone else and finding a new girl to date then if I might deal with a little bit of problems I normally wouldn’t if you can understand where I am coming from on that note.

4-Where do you go to find women that are of interest to you?
Recently I have to say I have been looking alot online, because I seem to have lost my edge on approaching women. I hate rejection like I believe most men do, and women can sometimes be really harsh on a guy if they don’t like him. I hear people say never meet a guy in a club, but I disagree, because of a lot of reasons one thing if you meet a guy in a club one thing is certain of you and his possibility you and him, he likes the same types of events you do, or is willing to at least try something new, because you met him there. I am a firm believer that when people are in social gatherings it is a time when they have there guard down and allow you to approach them in one aspect. Grocery stores and stuff like that always seem creepy to me to approach a person, because when you are in places like that you are there for something, to eat not to be hit on. I don’t think Church is it; because your concentration should be on worshiping God, I am sure there are a lot of wholesome women there, but maybe afterwards. Bars are good to, but overall I think events are the best place and online. One thing is certain if you meet a person at a club or online, the first few date that person is only going to let you see what they want you to see, it is not until you have kissed them and spent a couple of nights with them not even sexually for that matter will you know what you are really getting into.

The Question

So I was out last night at a launch party for a website devoted to natural hair care (Check out the review on Product Junkie Diva's Blog) and I had the opportunity to meet some new people as I took in the great atmosphere and fabulous music. As I made small talk, I realized whenever you're in these situations (also at family functions) there are certain key questions that come up. It may start off with how you know mutual friend(s), how'd you get to the hotspot, what do you do for a living, where do you live/work, and dang it don't forget the number one conversation starter THE WEATHER! Family members just cut to the chase and ask this question after saying hello lol. Once you've covered those topics, it's evitable that what seems to be the most interesting question that people may want to know is (drum roll please!!!) Are you dating anyone?

Now maybe it's just me, but I never ask about whether or not you have a "Boo" unless you happen to mention it in conversation. However, for some reason this loaded question can be a hit or miss for some people. I've seen the glimmer of interest leave the conversation when you inform them you're not in LOVE and happy or if for some reason you inform someone you are dating they have this "oh ok whatever...can you not be so happy, cause I'm single" look. Why do people feel they HAVE to ask that question?? Does it somehow give you brownie points if you're attached??

How do you feel about this question whether it's being asked by a co-worker, a friend you haven't seen you in a long time and it's the 1st question on their lips, or your Mama/Family Members who's dying to marry you off? Or do you think it’s not a big deal at all?